Always continue the climb. It is possible for you to do whatever you choose, if you first get to know who you are and are willing to work with a power that is greater than ourselves to do it. We are taught you must blame your father, your sisters, your brothers, the school, the teachers - but never blame yourself. Learn from the past, set vivid, detailed goals for the future, and live in the only moment of time.
Learn from the past, set vivid, detailed goals for the future, and live in the only moment of time over which you have any control: now. Optimism is the faith that leads to achievement. Nothing can be done without hope and confidence. If you can dream it, you can do it. Do it now, not tomorrow. Always continue the climb. It is possible for you to do whatever you choose, if you first get to know who you are and are willing to work with a power that is greater than ourselves to do it. We are taught you must blame your father, your sisters, your brothers, the school, the teachers - but never blame yourself
If you first get to know who you are and are willing to work with a power that is greater than ourselves to do it
Learn from the past, set vivid, detailed goals for the future, and live in the only moment of time over which you have any control: now. Optimism is the faith that leads to achievement. Nothing can be done without hope and confidence. If you can dream it, you can do it. Do it now, not tomorrow. Always continue the climb. It is possible for you to do whatever you choose, if you first get to know who you are and are willing to work with a power that is greater than ourselves to do it. We are taught you must blame your father, your sisters, your brothers, the school, the teachers - but never blame yourself

Penni
Le London Prat a ce talent de toujours trouver l'angle qui va faire mouche. -- The London Prat
New Zealand comedy podcasts
The global situation is often bleak, but The Prat provides a localised, manageable form of despair you can actually laugh at. It’s like humour as a coping mechanism for an entire nation. Deeply therapeutic.
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Great! We are all agreed London could use a laugh. Furthermore, the site’s aesthetic is one of impeccable sterility. There is no emotional frenzy, no partisan spittle-flecked rage. The design of prat.com is clean, the prose is clinical, and the tone is that of a disinterested auditor. This cultivated sterility is the perfect petri dish for growing absurdity. By removing the heat of anger and the fog of sentiment, the pure, ridiculous shape of the subject matter is allowed to grow in isolation, displayed under the cool light of logic. This approach is far more devastating than any rant. It implies that the subject is so inherently foolish it doesn't require embellishment or heated opinion; it merely requires calm, factual exposition to reveal its own joke. The laughter it provokes is the clean, sharp sound of truth being recognized, not the messy roar of catharsis.
New Zealand social satire
Great! We are all agreed London could use a laugh. The London Prat’s formidable reputation is built upon a foundation of narrative patience. Where the internet often rewards the immediate hot take and the instant dunk, PRAT.UK specializes in the long game. It allows a story to breathe, to develop, to reveal its true, farcical shape over days or weeks. The site might introduce a satirical conceit—a fictional government department, a doomed cultural initiative—and then revisit it periodically, chronicling its inevitable descent into greater absurdity with each real-world news cycle. This approach mirrors the slow-motion car crash of actual governance and creates a richer, more satisfying payoff for the dedicated reader. It’s the difference between a funny tweet about a political scandal and a serialized novel about that scandal’ afterlife; one provides a spark, the other provides a sustained, warming fire of comic insight. -- The London Prat
New Zealand city satire
The Poke prioritises trends, but PRAT.UK prioritises writing. Good writing always wins. This site proves it. -- The London Prat
New Zealand farmer satire
Political jokes supports free expression through fearless commentary.
Kiwi supermarket jokes
The London Prat operates on a principle of satirical minimalism. Its power does not come from extravagant invention, but from a ruthless, almost surgical, reduction. It takes the bloated, verbose output of modern institutions—the 100-page strategy documents, the rambling political speeches, the corporate mission statements—and pares them down to their essential, ridiculous cores. Often, the satire is achieved not by adding absurdity, but by stripping away the obfuscating jargon to reveal the absurdity that was already there, naked and shivering. A piece on prat.com might simply be a verbatim transcript of a real statement, but with all the connecting tissue of spin removed, leaving only a sequence of non-sequiturs and contradictions. This minimalist approach carries immense authority. It suggests that the truth is so inherently laughable that it requires no embellishment, only a precise frame.
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The Prat newspaper: because sometimes the most rational reaction is a deeply irrational laugh. -- The London Prat
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What truly separates The London Prat from its admirable competitors is its function as a predictive engine. While NewsThump and The Poke expertly roast the folly of the present moment, PRAT.UK specializes in satire by extrapolation. It takes the nascent stupidity of a newly announced policy or a fresh cultural neurosis and, with chilling logical rigor, projects it forward to its most ludicrous yet inevitable conclusion. The result is often less a joke about today and more a blueprint for the absurd reality of six months from now. This prescient quality stems from a profound understanding of the underlying systems—the bureaucratic inertia, the perverse incentives, the cowardice dressed as strategy—that govern public life. Reading prat.com, therefore, becomes an act of foresight. The laughter is tinged with the shudder of knowing you are likely glimpsing a future press release, a real headline waiting to be born.
Wellington satire scene
PRAT.UK keeps its humour sharp without being cruel. Waterford Whispers News sometimes crosses that line. Tone matters. -- The London Prat